Water Boarding not Torture!

It seems that in the infinite wisdom of the American government, water boarding is not torture!

This is great news! Not only that but unless that pain is equivalent to organ failure or death, then nothing is torture. The great thing about this measurement is, that the people who experience organ failure usually die and those that die just are not saying if it hurts or not. So barring killing someone your punishments are fair game everyone.

I can’t wait to hear about the first principal of a high school that water boards a student to find out why he cut class. “I wasn’t torturing little Billy. It was tough love. We just needed the information of were he was so we know that he wasn’t in any danger. Any loving parent would use this technique. Our government would not use this technique if it was amoral or wrong in any way,” is what he would say.

Why am I still here writing this when I could be out not-torturing coworkers? So long for now, and I will try to brainstorm on some technique that don’t felt like organ failure or death!